Lauren Foley is redefining how women’s voices are heard. As a feminist digital communications consultant, speaker, and writer, Lauren brings a fresh perspective to the industry, fuelled by her academic background in Gender, Justice, and Society (MSc) and her passion for equity. Named Diverse In’s Inspiring Women Leaders List in 2021, Lauren’s work empowers female entrepreneurs, advocates for justice, and inspires a new generation of women leaders.
1. What inspired you to transition from studying law and economics to focusing on gender equality, feminism, and women’s rights? Was there a defining moment or experience that led to this shift?
As cheesy as it sounds, I just couldn’t not. I had been in my university’s Feminist Society and had gotten a taste for what my future world and professional community could look like. And six weeks into my master’s in law and economics, I was accepted onto this three-day social impact retreat called 'Impact Aimers' and, once more, I was exposed to a new world; I met people who were actually able to make a living by working in social impact. Up until that point, it hadn’t occurred to me that I could both do good and also keep a roof over my head. It’s so obvious now but when you grow up hearing “oh, there’s no jobs in that” from people that in fact did not have jobs in “that” (so how would they even know?), it shapes your ambitions and what you think is possible. Once my world was expanded, there was no going back.
I also had known what it was to be sitting at a desk miserable knowing I was just contributing to a company or individual making more money but not actually achieving anything that I viewed as worthwhile. I specifically remember one instance where I was reading an annual report of a large multi-national company I was interning for during that master’s and seeing that the ‘goal’ for that year was X amount of dollars and I thought, “wait, that’s the goal? Shouldn’t there be a primary goal or purpose that is greater than that and then money is just a nice byproduct of that?” But no, money was the goal, nothing else, and it just made me feel empty. I then got a few small opportunities in subsequent jobs to do a bit of gender-related work and it just showed me how useful and fulfilled I can be when I’m actually doing work that I believe in and am good at. I’ve been on this professional feminist path ever since.
2. You’ve worked in various countries and with different organisations, including top Irish law firms and UN Women. How have these diverse experiences shaped your perspective on gender equality and feminism?
There’s a couple of things I would say to this. Firstly, that there are many different avenues and methods with which to practise feminism i.e. within the corporate sector, the non-profit sector, just in your daily life, etc. There is a need for it everywhere and so whether you choose to dedicate your entire life to it or simply whether you’re part of a women’s empowerment group within your company or you call out street harassment when you see it, it’s needed everywhere and it’s amazing whatever you can do to be a part of the solution to gender inequality. Just start where you’re at. Doing this work is nuanced and I will never judge people for choosing not to make this fight their entire lives. It’s emotionally and physically exhausting and often doesn’t pay very well in comparison to the so-called ‘sell-out’ jobs. Do what you need to do for you but do try and leave the world better than you found it.
I have also learned that, maybe cynically, people may claim to be feminist in the public sphere and be the furthest thing from it in private settings so I advise being aware and protecting yourself even in settings where you thought you could let your hair down and be vulnerable. Again, feminism needs to be practised everywhere; from fighting to make sure girls all over the world receive an education to making sure your employee feels they are treated fairly. If you’re going to claim to be feminist, really BE a feminist.
I’ve also learned that, yes, people may have motives and specific angles as to why they’re getting involved in gender equality but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. If you can leverage whatever that motive is for the greater good (while ultimately not being insanely irresponsible) then that’s probably OK and might move the needle on issues that otherwise might not have. Be open to being flexible as to how you achieve gender equality, even if it’s not in the way you imagined.
Something I think that is not talked about enough is this idea that feminism is only needed ‘over there, in those countries’ where women are ‘actually oppressed’, that we’ve achieved gender equality here in ‘the west’, for example. Certainly, there are different levels of intensity with regards to sexism and gender inequality in different places around the world but there are also different contexts with different histories and needs. Just because I can wear a bikini here doesn’t mean I’m ‘free’ and just because she might have to cover there doesn’t mean she’s not. It’s insulting to women’s experiences everywhere to assume you know what they need and it stops you from seeing the oppression happening right on your doorstep, even if we have gotten very good at hiding it.
Finally, I’ve learned that feminism is forever changing and to be open to changing your mind on things. Language evolves. Thinking evolves. People’s collective consciousness evolves. Don’t ever think you ‘know’ feminism or gender equality. Know your worth and own your lived experience, especially if you’re a woman, but also be humble and open to being proved wrong, especially if you come from a place of privilege.
3. Growing up, you faced gender stereotypes and societal expectations. How have these early experiences influenced your career and advocacy work?
My experiences of sexism and discrimination growing up and even now definitely show up in and correlate with the specific things that I fight for. For example, as an extremely privileged woman, a lot of the discrimination or oppression I face comes in the form of micro aggressions or everyday sexism and so, this is what I am particularly passionate about addressing. Examples of this include street harassment like catcalling or period stigma or something that grinds my gears, the urinary leash, which is essentially about the lack of women’s bathrooms in public spaces compared to men’s (who don’t need them as much for various reasons) and how this curbs our freedom (more so than it already is). It’s the undermining and underestimation of these issues that make them so fascinating and infuriating to me. We happily ignore or just ‘get over’ these issues because they’re just ‘not that big of a deal’ but I strongly believe that if we can’t solve the ‘small’ things, how are we meant to solve the ‘big’ things? Women’s issues are like a pyramid with all of the everyday microaggressions at the bottom and the ‘more serious’ issues at the top. They’re all connected and related. We must tackle all of them. Of course I’m also very passionate about those ‘bigger’ issues like FGM (Female Genital Mulltilation) or domestic violence or femicide - things I haven’t personally experienced - but I definitely feel more confident in advocating for things like everyday sexism with which I have personal experience and which I believe don’t get enough airtime.
4. What strategies do you believe are most effective in combating street harassment and improving women's safety in public spaces?
Simply put, the only thing we, as a society, can do to combat street harassment and improve women’s safety in public spaces is to teach men not to harass women. That’s it.
...although, because I live in the real world and because it will be a long time before men stop harassing women, there are a few other things I will say.
I’m really fascinated by feminist and sexist urban planning. As we all know, the world is still dominated by men and that includes the people who design cities, who decide where street lights go and how many there will be, who decide what paths will be built, and who decide what public parks or playgrounds there will be and where. All of these things influence how women go about their day and how safe they feel in their surroundings. More feminist urban planning would be greatly welcomed but again it is not a fix for men who want to harass women. As we all know, women aren’t safe in the daytime. More street lights are not going to deter a predator.
On a day-to-day basis, I’ve gone back and forth over the years about what’s the best way to handle street harassment when you are confronted with it. I used to always talk back and ask the men harassing me questions to try to understand. Of course, this is never as satisfying as you would like it to be. The dream scenario is that these men immediately apologise and look deep within and discover that there’s some unhealed childhood wound that is making them shout at women they don’t know on the street. But very often, they will either just double down or they will act like they didn’t do what they literally just did. Now more often than not I conserve my energy and protect my peace and keep walking. Yes, there’s guilt that I’m somehow perpetuating street harassment by not trying to stop it at every turn but no matter how much I talk back to these men, I’m not going to magically change the world and so, if I want to just keep walking and enjoy my day, then I will do just that and don’t judge any other woman who wants to do the same. The world is hard enough for women without feeling responsible to fix all the harms done against us. I do enough.
On a comical and practical note, however, when you are feeling in the mood to confront them (and not to undermine the seriousness of what women go through), I recommend watching Kyle Prue on Tik Tok who teaches you things to say to men to piss them off. I’m excited for the day that I get to use one of them. My favourite is if a guy catcalls you to say back: “sorry, I don’t have any change”. Perfect.
5. In your work with various gender equality organisations, what are some successful examples of collaboration that have led to tangible change?
I’m not going to sugarcoat this one. I don’t know if I can give a great answer here. I would love to say that something I did led to major, tangible change that had tremendously positive ripple effects for women and girls globally but I don’t know that I can. The work we do is incredibly hard to measure. Even when we try, it’s laced with limitations of data and sources and inconsistencies. I think I would take this opportunity to question what is ‘tangible change’? Is it a change in policy or law or is it simply changing someone’s perspective on something? The latter I have definitely done and that is incredibly satisfying and I think just as honourable. Would it be great to be able to say that something I did led to a court appealing a sexist decision or a government enacting a feminist law however? Yes, but then of course, I would wonder how and if that law were being implemented correctly. So, one will never be fully satisfied in this line of work. There will always be a changing goal post. I would take this opportunity to suggest becoming comfortable with the fact that you might do this work for years and years and never see the kind of ‘tangible change’ you want. But we do it anyway because we hope and deep down we know we’re making change even if it’s hard to see sometimes. We also know that there’s nothing else we would rather do.
6. How do your backgrounds in law and economics inform your approach to gender equality and women’s rights issues?
I want to say nothing other than it showed me what I definitely didn’t want to do. As challenging as working in women’s rights can be sometimes (financially being just one of them), when I think of working in corporate law or something similar, a little part of me dies inside but that’s just me. As I mentioned earlier, people need to do what’s right for them, and that’s certainly not what’s right for me, so I’m grateful to have experienced that world early on and learn that it wouldn’t have brought me fulfilment in the long run.
I will say, however, that it showed me how complicated and nuanced legal processes can be and how something can be horrifically unfair and still technically legal or lawful (not that that makes it any easier of a pill to swallow though). And it taught me about the gaps and blind spots that still exist in law. This probably makes me cynical and not believe in the legal system as a vehicle for justice but it does make me more determined and creative, I believe, because I don’t think women can rely on the justice system for justice; it makes me believe in and try other avenues to achieve awareness and other kinds of ‘justice’.
My background in law and economics also taught me to always read more than the headline to get the true picture of a situation, to read the fine print, to always back up my arguments with solid references, and to not leave any room for someone to poke holes in my arguments, to be prepared for what I might come up against and to be ready with rebuttals. I will forever be grateful for that training.
7. As a feminist digital communications consultant, what are your top tips for effectively communicating complex issues related to gender justice to a broad audience?
Simplify, simplify, simplify!! This is so much easier said than done because the internet is a tough place where there is simultaneously no room for nuance and every expectation of it. You can’t possibly put every single caveat and preface and disclaimer and so on and so forth into a quick graphic post or short video. Even in a long form blog post, you can’t include everything. You have to become very comfortable with this and expect that people will have questions and comments. But instead of letting that stress you, use it to make your next piece of content. This way, you’re making an initial digestible piece of content, it’s generating engagement, you're then interacting with your audience and showing them that you care and creating a whole new piece of content at the same time. This could go on and on, which is great - win-win! Essentially, you want people to actually view your content; if you put too much in there for fear of retaliation if you don’t, you risk no one engaging with your post at all. At least if there’s retaliation because you didn’t add in one bit of nuance, for example, that’s still engagement and an opportunity for you to educate your audience more.
If you want to start communicating about gender equality but don’t know where to begin, a great tip I learned before was to type your particular topic into Google. Let’s say, ‘gender equality’, for example. Then, in the results, scroll down to the ‘People also ask’ section and you get a never ending list of the kinds of questions people are asking about gender equality. Start answering those with your content. They might seem basic to you if you’re an expert on gender equality but many people have never interacted with feminism before and to many, it’s very scary, so starting off with the basics to get people comfortable and up to speed before moving on to more complex topics or longer form pieces is a great strategy.
Also, if you’re thinking ‘well, this has all been talked about before, I’m not really saying anything new’, to that, I would say, 1) you’re right, this has all been talked about before, but has everyone heard it before? The answer to that is no. There are people that you can reach that others can’t. Let other people talk to their audience and you talk to yours. Even if you’re saying the same things as them, you’re reaching different people and together making the world a better place. There is not only room but a severe need for everyone to talk about gender equality. And 2) you have a unique perspective on everything because of your lived experience. You have stories you can tell that no one else can. Embrace that and add your voice to the mix!
8 What are some of the biggest challenges you’ve faced in your career advocating for gender equality, and how have you overcome them?
I’ve advocated for gender equality in many different ways over the decade. Most notably online through video and writing. One of the first biggest challenges in that regard was just sheer embarrassment and caring what people thought. I overcame that firstly because I realised that I cared more about gender inequality than what people thought about me putting myself out there online. And I cared more about the career that I wanted to make for myself by creating this online platform than by what people thought. And that drove me. The thing you’re fighting for has to weigh more than the embarrassment. If it doesn’t, then maybe that’s a sign you’re fighting for something you’re not actually that passionate about. If that’s the case, rethink things and try again.
There’s also the feeling that you’re annoying people by posting about gender inequality too much. To get over this, I convinced myself that everyone viewing my content was actually bots so I wasn’t actually annoying real humans (although this wasn’t at all true). And I just really put the power in other people’s hands. I thought, ‘if I’m annoying them, they can unfollow me and that’s OK. I will continue to post no matter what.’ Men in my comment section or in my DMs fighting me, undermining me, or harassing me is also a constant challenge. And I used to approach this similarly to how I approached street harassment; I used to talk back. Now, more often than not, I pick my battles and protect my peace. I could spend time battling one guy in my DMs who just wants to fight or I could use my limited time more wisely and reach the masses who might be more open to learning.
There’s also the feeling that no one’s listening or paying attention or that there’s just too many problems to fix so I should just give up but I’ve been so lucky over the years that people have been so supportive so even one comment from someone saying they see what I’m doing and it resonates with them or it sparked an awakening in them has been so powerful. I’ve used that to keep going. This is also why I always advocate for people to support people they admire. Tell them you admire them and support what they’re doing. You have no idea how much it means and how much it will drive them to keep going and create more content.
In my more professional settings working on digital communications for feminist clients, doing a lot with little resources is always going to be a challenge in the gender equality world and burnout is extremely common in the non-profit sector as a whole. To combat this, I always try to work smarter, not harder and to get creative. For example, you could make seven social media posts a week or you could leverage one key moment in that week that would bring you much more attention. For example, when I worked on the International Confederation of Midwives’ PUSH Campaign, if we saw a celebrity or a notable figure talking about the power of midwives, we jumped on that straight away and used that major moment to highlight our issues while it was topical or trending. You could spend weeks and weeks creating a load of content that nobody sees but then you leverage one celebrity moment and all of a sudden your engagement and followers spike. Using your time wisely is key. Obviously then however you need to keep those new followers and eyeballs engaged and make sure they’re there to see midwifery content and not content about that specific celebrity but getting that initial hook is a great start to begin making conversions.
9. Who have been your role models or mentors throughout your career, and what impact have they had on your journey?
There’s two online personalities that I follow who I adore and really inspire me:
Liz Plank, a major feminist activist, shows me that it’s OK for your feminist content to be funny and happy (if that’s the mood you’re feeling) and that being angry isn’t the only way to get across feminist content. You can be funny and light and still get across the message of how serious an issue is. She also just inspires me to be a normal human in this space.
Glo Atanmo, a “nicheless ninja”, shows me that it’s OK to pivot and to be OK with not being everyone’s cup of tea. That you don’t have to continue with something just because that’s what you once did. If it no longer aligns with who you are now and what you want to do, you can change, and those who want to follow along will continue to do so no matter what season you’re in.
Then there’s three feminist friends/colleagues/icons of mine who have really helped shape and inspire me:
Emma Rainey showed me it’s OK to be angry and serious about the issues you care about and to not be afraid of coming off as an ‘unattractive, angry woman’. Who cares? I definitely did and still do but she inspires me every day to keep shouting from the rooftops about what women go through in this world even if the powers that be will try to shut you up.
Lisa-Marie Salley-Kerhascoet inspires me to be a grown-up, to own my skills, be confident, and to put myself out there even if other people (or myself) think I’m too young or inexperienced. She has always seen my worth and has built me up for years now. She is a treasure trove of advice and is always more than willing to give it.
Veronika Horvath taught me to honour myself and my boundaries. Before working with her, it never occurred to me to not work extra long hours to get something done, even if it meant at a detriment to myself. She taught me that my wellbeing and energy levels come first and everything else comes second and I’m so grateful to have learned that relatively early on in my career.
10. What are your future goals in the gender equality sphere, and what new opportunities or projects are you excited to pursue?
Have you ever heard of something called the urinary leash, the issue I mentioned briefly above?
It’s this concept that because women need longer in the bathroom for a variety of reasons (periods, pregnancy, caring for children/elderly parents, more layers of clothing, taking longer to get in and out of cubicles, among many others) and because we’re already starting at a disadvantage to men (my guess is that you can fit a lot more urinals in 10 square metres than you can cubicles), our freedoms are further restricted (more so than they already are as women living in this society) and our basic enjoyment of life curbed.
Ask yourself:
How often have you suffered through a concert needing to pee but just couldn’t face the women’s bathroom queues for fear of missing half the concert?
How often have you had to catch up with your group of guy friends later because you know you’ll be a minimum of ten minutes going to the bathroom where they’ll only be two?
How many times have you restricted your water intake just so you didn’t have to exhaust yourself even thinking about having to interact with a bathroom?
Architects (who, let’s face it, are still predominantly men) are designing gender equal buildings when they should really be designing gender equitable buildings. It’s not good enough for women’s bathrooms to have four cubicles and men’s bathrooms to have eight urinals. By attempting to be ‘fair’ and ‘equal’, the opposite is actually happening and women’s lives and freedoms are further limited.
Just look at Hong Kong! In 2015 they introduced new building standards forcing all new developments to build proportionally more facilities for women than men. It can be done and it should!
This is something I’m unbelievably passionate about and they say if you can’t stop thinking about something, you need to act on it, and this is that for me. I would definitely love to pursue legitimate policy change on this someday if I were brave and energetic enough to take it on.
A new venture that I’m also incredibly excited to pursue is potentially becoming a doula. I’m almost nervous to speak it into existence because it only occurred to me recently but it makes complete sense for me. As a feminist, I am extremely passionate about all things birth and how poorly women and birthing people are treated when they are pregnant, in labour, and post-partum. The medicalisation of birth, the racism, and the lack of autonomy and mistrust that our bodies know what to do, to name just a few issues, both fascinates and infuriates me. I want to be a part of creating happy birth experiences and ensure that women bring their children into this world in the least traumatic way possible. I’m currently looking into training options and am excited about what this potential new chapter could bring. Watch this space!
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