Standing up for yourself at work as a woman isn’t just about being difficult or anything like that. It’s about doing what’s fair and right for you. Sometimes you can face double standards, requiring patient strategy and confidence to negotiate.
We think it’s important for women in general to be able to stand up for themselves at work. How can you do this personally? What strategies should you implement?
Become a master of saying no in a positive way
One of the first things you’ll want to look into doing is mastering the art of saying no in a positive way. Instead of flat-out saying no to a task, you can frame your negative response around your current responsibilities.
For example, if somebody asks you to take on some extra work in your role, you might say that you’re currently busy focusing on providing a high-quality output elsewhere and you’re unable to take on the task. This approach is particularly important with management because they’re also incentivized to make sure that you do a good job. If you’re overworked or have too much on your caseload, then you can’t do this.
Reclaim your time
Another thing you’ll want to do while working in the office is reclaim your time. Studies show that women are often subject to repeated interruptions and are unable to focus on their work as much as they would like in their lives. This breaks their rhythm and prevents them from doing the deep work that really moves the needle.
Unfortunately, dealing with interruptions can be challenging, but there are ways to do it without creating hostility in the workplace. One of the best ways is to tell the person who interrupted you that you’re not quite finished with a particular task and ask them to return later once you’re done. Saying something like, “I just need a couple more minutes to finish this email, and then I’ll get back to you,” is the perfect way to deflect them while also teaching them the value of your focus over time. Most people will learn to choose convenient times to get in touch with you, and they may be even more respectful with your time.
Don’t put up with any form of harassment
If you experience any form of harassment in the workplace, don’t let it slip. Once sexual harassment begins, it can escalate.
If you experience harassment, go to a manager immediately and tell them what’s happened. Also begin any internal complaints processes that are available. If you feel the harassment or incident was serious, then you should raise the case with a qualified attorney who specialises in the area. Don’t allow situations like this to pass by. Take action immediately to prevent the issue from occurring in the future and to ensure that the opposing party can’t harm anybody else.
Practise being neutral
Another way you can stand up for yourself in the office as a woman is to practise being neutral. This is critical, even when you’re receiving unfair feedback or being spoken down to. A calm and neutral expression is actually a Machiavellian approach to gaining power in the office.
Nervous smiling or tilting your head can be a way of triggering other people to see you as someone submissive when you’re not. Keep your head up and your posture straight, and don’t change your body position regardless of how people speak to you.
Build a network of allies
If you work in a particularly hostile office, it’s a good idea to build a network of allies. You need people around you who are willing to be on your team and support your meetings.
If a colleague repeats your idea and gets credit for it, mention that it is part of the framework that you are using. For example, you could say something like, “That’s a great point, and it builds perfectly on what I was suggesting earlier.” This type of approach can help you gain favour with other people while also asserting your power and control.
Address office housework issues
Finally, if you feel like you’re being given lots of so-called office housework, like taking minutes or organising office parties, suggest a rotation. Tell the other people in your organisation that you’ve handled these tasks recently, and it’s time for somebody else to take them over, especially if it’s not an explicit part of your role or the reason why you were hired.
So, which of these strategies are you going to use to stand up for yourself at work?